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As anyone who has spent more than a few hours with me will tell you, I'm not really a fighter. I am one of those people who would much rather tap out before any fight has begun than throw a single punch. I'd rather stay quiet than challenge someone I don't agree with. And in general, I tend to take whatever is dished out to me and be on my way instead of trying to do something about it.

But at the same time, I must admit that there are things I probably should have fought for that I have not. I must recognize that if there are things that aren't worth fighting for, there must be things that are. And as I sit down and reflect on the movie Never Back Down, I must ask myself, what makes a fight worth fighting and what doesn't?

From beginning to end, Never Back Down is a movie about fighting. It's about a high school boy named Jake (Sean Faris) who is "a natural born brawler." It's about the all-holds-barred Friday night fight club tradition at his new high school in Orlando. It's about Ryan (Cam Gigandet), the school's fighting champion and reigning Mr. Popular. And it's about Roqua (Djimon Hounsou), a mixed martial arts instructor who has a bit more respect for fighting than Jake and Ryan.

When the movie begins, Jake cannot seem to keep from getting into fight after fight after fight. As cheesy as it is, all his fights pretty much begin with a "Yo Daddy." But as we learn more about Jake, we find that that very taunt has more meaning for him than it does for most of us. You see, his father died in a drunk driving accident—his father being drunk, and Jake being the one in the passenger seat who didn't stop him from driving. And every time someone pushes Jake back there, it is as if his anger at his father, at himself, and at the situation just explodes all over the place.

While Jake's fighting seems to only erupt when triggered, Ryan's is a show he eagerly puts on for others on a regular basis. Ryan fights to be at the top and to prove he is the best. Every time he throws a punch, it is to show whoever it hits that they are inferior and the crowds watching that he is superior. Without a crowd, Ryan won't dish out more than a shove. And when Ryan is denied the chance to prove he is the best, let's just say he's not happy.

But the problem with both Jake and Ryan's fighting is that for as much as they do it, it doesn't get either of them anywhere. The problem for Jake is that the anger that fuels his fights stems from things he cannot change. With every beating he gives to others, it is as if he is trying to kill a reality that he does not want to exist. But after each fight, the trouble is that it still is there and he is still angry.

For Ryan, the issue is that he is like the champion who only wins because he has killed all of his competitors. The problem he faces is that if his only value is found in putting others below him, he will spend his entire life doing just that. And as a number of characters show us later in the movie, eventually that kind of self-value is one that everyone will see right through.

Enter fight instructor Roqua. He may not be Mr. Miyagi; the story that follows may not be Karate Kid. But for better or for worse, after making it past a few more explosions of misplaced anger and completing his training with Roqua, Jake is able to see that fighting is not always a solution. He sees that the only way he can get rid of his anger is to accept his reality, not try to kill it. And he acknowledges that when it comes to getting rid of anger, releasing it on someone else doesn't make it go away.

But because we do not live in a simple world where the only reasons for fighting are anger and selfishness, the story continues. Jake may have given up fighting as a way to destroy a reality he cannot change, he may have already known that it is no way to prove his own value, but when he is given a different reason—to defend others and possibly affect a reality he can change—he gets his gloves back out.

At first Roqua tells him not to go. He tells Jake that there will be consequences for fighting no matter what your reason for doing it. But after the two talk and Roqua sees that what Jake now fights for is something bigger than himself that is worth the risk, both head off to fight their own fights. Jake would rather not fight anymore. Roqua has been avoiding his fight for many years. But as Jake tells Roqua, "Sometimes fighting the fight means doing the one thing you don't want to do."

At the end of it all, the message of Never Back Down is fairly simple. Don't fight when you don't have to. Don't throw punches to change what cannot be changed or to elevate yourself by knocking others down. But when something of value is at stake, when there is something we can do to stop injustice or to make this world a better place, sometimes we must stand up and fight.

Although most of Never Back Down is about physical fighting, not all of our fights will be. To bring the end to some injustices may require physical force. But in many other cases, fighting the fight will simply mean stepping up to the plate, putting out our effort, and risking a bit of ourselves in the process. I can't tell you all of the occasions when that fight is called for. I suspect that it will often come down to the individual situation. But if we take a cue from Jake, following his example of putting others before ourselves and fighting to preserve our connections with others might not be a bad way to start.

As Roqua says to Jake several times throughout the movie, "Everybody has their fight." But when we do fight, the question is, are we fighting for something that is actually of value? And when a fight is necessary, are we willing to take the risk and step into the ring?