What is it that divides fathers and sons? It's an important question for those of us who are both. Is it just a matter of growing up and learning the old man isn't the godlike figure we thought him to be? Is it the father who causes the separation or the son? Can there be reconciliation or is the gulf too wide to bridge?

As Blake Morrison's father Arthur was dying, Blake kept a diary of what he was going through in the process. It was meant for his own reflection, but in 1993 he published his account of trying to come to grips with his father and his father's death. It has now been adapted for the screen in When Did You Last See Your Father?

It is an excellent look at the relationship that existed between Blake and his father. It is a complicated relationship that developed over a lifetime. We see flashbacks of Blake as a child and as a teen. Even as an adult, Blake always feels his father is critical. After Blake receives a prestigious award, Arthur notes that the award is made of plastic. Blake confides to his wife he only wants two words: well and done. When Arthur is diagnosed with cancer and time becomes short, Blake hopes for a time to talk, but Arthur keeps getting weaker and more drugged. The time to talk is past.

Arthur was a larger than life figure for the young Blake (as most fathers are to children). Blake recalls that Arthur was lost if he couldn't cheat in some way (as he drives to the head of a line of cars and lies to get into a race event). Arthur was vivacious and loud. Blake, especially as a teen, was quiet and brooding. He found his father an embarrassment. (Don't all teens?) He discovers early on that his father is a bit of a philanderer. He disapproves of almost everything his father is.

The flashbacks give us a look at the relationship through the years. Oddly, even though Blake sees these events as showing his father's shortcomings (and he did have them), they also show, although Blake may not yet recognize it, the ways Arthur reached out to his son and even bragged about him in his own way. As I watched, I thought to myself that Arthur wasn't that bad of a father -- not perfect by any means, but a good sight better than many.

While all this is going on in Blake's memory, we see him acting toward his family with the same distance he hates about his father. Blake doesn't want to talk to his son on the phone, even though the son misses him. He goes off in search of the woman who was his first love and still living in town. He fails to understand that in many ways he is like his father. The thought would probably be appalling to him. But so often the sins of the father are passed on to the son.

Throughout the film there are scenes shot in mirrors. Perhaps it is a hint that things and people can be seen from different angles. Perhaps it is just a sign that this is a very reflective film. It grows out of Blake's reflections as his father is dying. It is also presented in such a way that we are invited to consider how we might see ourselves in the story -- as father, as son, perhaps even as both. Certainly I thought often through the film of my father, who died several years ago, and also of how I might seem to my sons when the time comes for them to remember me.

This is a film that cries out for a reconciliation -- for discovery of those things that may have seemed to be hidden -- for the sharing of love that went unspoken. It is up to the viewer to determine if that finally occurs. Certainly Blake still has questions after his father dies. We always have those questions. We may not really need the answers no matter how much we want them. Perhaps Blake and Arthur could never really talk about these things, but through his memories, Blake has a chance to see again the person his father was -- and share in the love that was always there.