MJ: I mean the easy answer to that question is that I was so focused on just getting good footage and good sound—because I was really just like a one man band, you know, kind of responsible for how it was going to look and how it was going to sound—that a lot of times I was not playing critical attention to what was being said; I was just making sure I was getting it and getting it to where it looked good. If I was working with a cameraman and a sound guy and I was sort of sitting back, I'm sure I would have been, you know, trying to bite my tongue a little bit. But first and foremost, I always wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt, whether it was about filmmaking or whether it was about believing in miracles that I don't believe in. I always wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt, 'cause I'm an outsider; who am I to say? I'm clearly getting something from this experience regardless. I'm making a film about them, and if I start to insert myself into that process, I put that at risk&ellips; It was something I was adamant about from day one. I'm not going to put myself in this film. I don't understand this world enough. It's not my place. It would be a very self-righteous and selfish thing for me to do. Sure, I don't agree with it, but that's not really for me to say; I'm just here to observe.

HJ: You have mentioned, though, that you made friends with some of the people in the church and studio; what were those friendships like?

MJ: They were real.



HJ: You also said you walked a thin line of being and insider and an outsider.

MJ: I mean, that's the tricky part of being a documentary filmmaker is that you form this relationship with your subject, and that relationship, does it change when the camera is off and when it's on? Probably. Also something I'm always a little bit self-conscious about was, like, how much of the time, with the camera on or off, was I being insincere or superficial in order to get them to like me in order to continue to get access? And how much of the time was it just a true friendship based on real life? I think it was a bit of both at different times. There were times when I probably was not being a true friend in my own sense of my world and how I operate in that world, but I think most of the time I was just kind of being me. Yeah, I was filming them; I wanted to make sure I continued to get access and get them to like me, but that's kind of who I am. I'm a pretty likeable guy anyways. Most importantly, when I did spend time with these people, with the camera on and specifically with the camera off, and we were just talking about life, that's a very real experience and there is a real connection there.

So I don't keep in touch in the same way that I do with other friends from other parts of my life, but I still feel like I had positive relationships and experiences during that time. I think at the end of it, I was just so exhausted by making this film that to continue a relationship there was an extension of the film. I just needed a complete break, like a break-up with a girlfriend or something; you just need that clean break.

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