Jersey Girl

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I didn’t love Jersey Girl as a whole, but the candid treatment of the theme sent me home with a head full of thoughts and feelings. Much like Cheaper by the Dozen, this movie deals with the choice between real responsibilities and real dreams. Ollie Trinke, the main character in the movie, wants something he isn’t willing to take care of—a child. His crisis of immaturity explodes when his wife dies during childbirth, forcing him to make a choice. It’s a choice everyone, mom or dad, makes when kids enter the picture.

To be fair, one can never be ready for the level of responsibility that children demand. It blindsides even the most prepared parents. Rather than simply being an addition to life, children actually create a dynamic and revolutionary change—a change that sends most people into complete shock. Ollie Trinke feels the shock, wishing for his life back. He pawns the child off on his dad for as long as Grandpa can take it. He delves into work. He even works at home. However, Grandpa finally draws the line in the sand and Ollie melts down, ruining his career. In a long monologue, Ollie makes a life-changing statement: “I’ll be the best daddy in the world because that’s what your mom wanted and it’s what you deserve. That’s all I am now, your daddy.�

Ollie has a long way to go, however. He must make the critical leap from, “That’s all I am now� to “That’s all I want to be now.� Unable to give up his dreams, he tries to make both parenthood and a career as a publicist work. Ollie’s reality does not prove to be so kind. He not only faces the challenge of an immeasurably damaged reputation, he also encounters opposition from his family when he finally gets a lucky break.

I sympathize with Ollie. It’s a tough gig to drop your aspirations and reject the areas where you are most talented. The biggest hurdle is the intoxication of our grandiose dreams. When we can’t do it all, we say things like Ollie said in a moment of anger. “You and your mommy took my life away and I just want it back.� The trouble is, as his girlfriend so wisely notes, “You’re telling people that what they have isn’t good enough for you.�

Unfortunately, the value of relationships seems to be a lesson for the elderly, something most people only see in retrospect. It’s not what we did, but who we were to those closest to us. One’s quality of life seems to depend on understanding this concept. It’s good to consider why Ollie wanted to be a good dad in the first place -- because it’s what his wife wanted and it’s what his daughter deserves. What do the people in our lives want and deserve? What do we want and deserve from others?

Christ had a handle on this, spending his entire life as a servant. Everywhere he went, he blessed, healed, protected, loved and cherished the people he encountered. He never pursued wealth or power. Fortunately, not everyone is destined to live a life of poverty and service, but hopefully we won’t be 80 years old before we learn from His priorities. God-given talents, wealth and power are incredible tools, but balance is key. We have to keep our eye on the mark: relationships. Like I said, I appreciated the movie’s candid treatment of this topic. It played hardball with my pride and immaturity. It forced me to face my own ambitions and ask, “At what cost?�

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Touching the Void

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Touching the Void is based on the true story of two mountain climber, Joe Simpson and Simon Yates. This film takes on more of a documentary feel than regular films, but that said, it far exceeds any documentary I have ever seen. There is nothing boring or even moderate about this film. It’s riveting, taking viewers on a whirlwind adventure that, with each turn, makes the story even more unbelievable. The cinematography is outstanding. It conveys without a doubt what it must have felt like out there, all alone against a furious, unrelenting mountain.

The Challenge of Living – This film has a lot to say about life and living it well. At the beginning of the film, Joe talks about how he and Simon wanted to climb the world. Immediately after, he comments about the kind of climbing they like to do, climbing without trails and without established routes. As they begin to conquer the mountain, he reflects on the amazing sense of freedom and space that exists away from the clutter of the world, and how climbing is a balance of power and grace. Indeed, it must be-- just like life. He talks of the trust and reliance on a partner, and the way that putting risk back into life makes a person feel more alive. Metaphors are spread throughout the movie; metaphors about climbing yourself into a trap that you can’t climb back out of, about persisting to the top just because you have come so far already, and about the treachery that often waits at the summit. But my very favorite line of the movie is, “You have to keep making decisions, even if they’re wrong decisions. If you quit deciding, you’re stuffed.� The honesty of this movie is refreshing—no cloak and dagger philosophy, just telling it like it is.

The story, however, is as depressing as it is triumphant. Don’t get me wrong, we celebrate every victory with Joe, regardless of how small. We want him to survive. We want him to conquer. We believe in the spirit and ability of mankind to overcome incredible odds. But as Joe grapples with death (and he does so several times), he makes consistent statements about how alone he feels throughout the journey.

The Challenge of Death—Of course, I waited (rather impatiently, I must admit) for the film to answer the all-consuming “moment of truth� question—does he come to believe in a power greater than himself or does his humanistic philosophy win out? It is strange how this question must be answered, even if we aren’t the ones dying. In the backs of our minds, each of us wonders…if it got right down to it, would I believe in God? Joe does not and he states very blatantly, very confidently, his atheistic view of life. When you die, that’s it. There’s nothing else, it’s over. Fair enough. Maybe the prospect of death doesn't make a believer out of him, but apparently, neither does the prospect of life. Regardless of what miraculous events occur as he climbs his way to safety, Joe continually encounters solitude in his deepest moments of need. The end is bittersweet. His last two statements draw a clear picture of what it's like to have God absent, and then what it's like to have God present. When he reaches base camp in the middle of the night and calls out, no one answers. He says, “When no one answered the call, I lost something. I lost me.� Then, when Simon and Richard rescue him, the thing he remembers most is, “…Simon grabbing my shoulders and holding me. I remember the feeling of being held.�

It has been said to me from time to time, that there is a God-shaped void within each of us, just waiting to be filled. I believe that’s true, and apparently so does Joe Simpson. At every point of desperation and reaching out for help, his unbelief forces him to look inside. There is nothing. There is a void. He touches it, time and time again. Now, it’s amazing to me how anyone can go through such an incredible event and not believe even a little bit. But, how incredible are our lives, and how many miracles do we encounter on our 70 year visit to this Earth? More than we think. Do we see God’s hand of provision? Do we believe? Or do we touch the void of self-sufficiency?

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