Episode 4: "My Heart Belongs to Daddy"
What makes a good parent? If you have kids, you have asked yourself this question a thousand times over and probably can’t come up with at sufficient answer.
This episode discusses the roles of fathers, but the plot also follows the women’s struggles with parenting. I’ll never forget the episode last season when Lynette had a total breakdown and sat under a tree crying. I have been there. I have melted down, screaming on the inside, “I have no idea what I’m doing! I’m not equipped for this! Who am I that I should manage and mold this child’s future? I’m going to destroy her completely if I don’t learn something quick.� I still have those breakdowns, and I know that women everywhere have the same conflicts stirring in their souls, even if they don’t readily admit it to themselves.
The good news is that God gives us a fine example of how to lovingly parent our children. He is called our Heavenly Father for a reason. His actions throughout the Bible prove that he is the ultimate authority on caring for every type of child in every stage of life – the stubborn hearted, the pliable, those who have suffered injustice at the hands of others, wayward children, those easily deceived, the highly charged, talented ones whose creativity requires special attention. You name it, he’s dealt with them. After all, he is the caretaker of every one of us. Let’s look at some of the attributes of God as seen in the mothers and fathers this week.
Lynette
Lynette battles the difficulty of being unable to attend Parker’s first day of school. She loves him, but cannot physically be there for him. In her absence, he creates a make-believe nanny, Mrs. Mulberry. When Lynette realizes the trauma that she has caused Parker, she crumbles. Her heart is just not able to bear the thought of him replacing her with an insubstantial being. This is much like our relationship with God. How does it break God’s heart when we try to fill our lives with empty, insubstantial elements? We often try to give our lives meaning and draw life from things like sex, addictions, work, success, fame, power, kids and lovers. But each of these things is insufficient to fill the gap. What does God do then? Just what Lynette did – He reminds us of his love, even though like Parker, we sometimes reject it. “I have loved you with an everlasting love…� (Jer. 31:3). “See I have engraved you on the palms of my hands…� (Isa. 49:16). He not only communicates his love for us through scripture, he also smashes the competition. It isn’t until we come face to face with the emptiness of these inept pursuits that we see God. Though we may complain about the times when he takes everything from us, we must admit that we see him more clearly without the clutter.
Gabrielle and Carlos
Gabrielle carefully chooses who will be in her unborn baby’s life. She must choose between John and Carlos, considering what the future of her child will be like. Her utmost desire is that the child be well cared for, and sometimes her perception of what is best for the baby changes. It’s a good thing that God does not waiver in his consideration of what and whom he allows in our lives. Some of you will shudder at this statement because you have suffered injustice at the hands of an abuser or a deceiver. And yet, God does not waste anything. Ecclesiastes 7:14 says, “When times are good, be happy; but when times are bad, consider: God has made the one as well as the other.� Does God allow suffering in our lives for nothing? Or does he use it to someone else’s advantage? If we will be open to healing, God will use these injustices to bless many others over the course of our lives. Jesus said, “Unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.� (John 12:24). He himself was willing to die in order to alter the lives of those who would come after him. Are we better than Christ that we will not die also, and be raised up to share the love of God?
Susan and Mike
Mike is searching for his lost son. Though Zach doesn’t know that Mike is his dad, Mike searches anyway. In the parable of the lost sheep, Jesus explains that a good shepherd will leave 99 sheep in an open field to go find just one that is lost (Luke 15:4-7). Susan sends Zach to Utah and speaks with double meaning when she says, “…you should go to him [Paul]. He’ll want to take care of you.� Her heart is thinking of Julie’s safety. Both of these parents have one goal in mind – protection. They want to protect their children in whatever way they can, and God has the same heart for us. “As the mountains surround Jerusalem, so the Lord surrounds his people…� (Psalm 125:2). Does that jive with the idea above that he allows trouble in our lives? Absolutely. Protection does not mean isolation from all things human. Humanity is sinful, and unless we depart this world, we will suffer at the hands of those who do not care for us. Still, there is protection in that God only allows into our lives what will benefit us and others somewhere down the road. He does not waste anything.
Bree
Bree stands as an advocate when no one else will stand for the kids in her life. When George tries to punish Andrew for his lewd talk without explaining what happened, her first reaction is to demand a reason. There must be just cause and not an empty accusation. Revelation 12:9-10 describes Satan as one who accuses men before God day and night. Later, when Gabrielle refers to Zach as a freak, Bree is the only one who stands up for him. She argues that Zach is the child of Mary Alice who grew up in their backyards. Like Bree, Christ stands as our ultimate advocate, discerning truth from empty accusation. “For there is one God and one mediator (advocate) between God and men, the man Christ Jesus� (1 Tim. 2:5). Christ’s work on the cross crushes the accusations of the enemy. No argument will stand against a person who has placed his or her trust in Christ. Not only is Christ the lawyer, he’s the judge.
These characters barely scratch the surface of the many ways that God models great parenting skills. There is so much more to learn, and he will teach us if we will seek the scriptures. He will also give us the strength to carry out the things we know to do. And for all you parents out there, remember that God will fill in the gaps. Wherever we fail, he will step up and parent our children for us. We can only do our best in the places we are in our lives. No amount of tweaking and refining will make us perfect parents, or our children perfect children. Just remember that his strength is made perfect in our weakness and his grace is sufficient for us.
And, if you haven't checked it out yet, please read the Message to Mom's of Toddlers (if you have toddlers, of course!).
This episode discusses the roles of fathers, but the plot also follows the women’s struggles with parenting. I’ll never forget the episode last season when Lynette had a total breakdown and sat under a tree crying. I have been there. I have melted down, screaming on the inside, “I have no idea what I’m doing! I’m not equipped for this! Who am I that I should manage and mold this child’s future? I’m going to destroy her completely if I don’t learn something quick.� I still have those breakdowns, and I know that women everywhere have the same conflicts stirring in their souls, even if they don’t readily admit it to themselves.
The good news is that God gives us a fine example of how to lovingly parent our children. He is called our Heavenly Father for a reason. His actions throughout the Bible prove that he is the ultimate authority on caring for every type of child in every stage of life – the stubborn hearted, the pliable, those who have suffered injustice at the hands of others, wayward children, those easily deceived, the highly charged, talented ones whose creativity requires special attention. You name it, he’s dealt with them. After all, he is the caretaker of every one of us. Let’s look at some of the attributes of God as seen in the mothers and fathers this week.
Lynette
Lynette battles the difficulty of being unable to attend Parker’s first day of school. She loves him, but cannot physically be there for him. In her absence, he creates a make-believe nanny, Mrs. Mulberry. When Lynette realizes the trauma that she has caused Parker, she crumbles. Her heart is just not able to bear the thought of him replacing her with an insubstantial being. This is much like our relationship with God. How does it break God’s heart when we try to fill our lives with empty, insubstantial elements? We often try to give our lives meaning and draw life from things like sex, addictions, work, success, fame, power, kids and lovers. But each of these things is insufficient to fill the gap. What does God do then? Just what Lynette did – He reminds us of his love, even though like Parker, we sometimes reject it. “I have loved you with an everlasting love…� (Jer. 31:3). “See I have engraved you on the palms of my hands…� (Isa. 49:16). He not only communicates his love for us through scripture, he also smashes the competition. It isn’t until we come face to face with the emptiness of these inept pursuits that we see God. Though we may complain about the times when he takes everything from us, we must admit that we see him more clearly without the clutter.
Gabrielle and Carlos
Gabrielle carefully chooses who will be in her unborn baby’s life. She must choose between John and Carlos, considering what the future of her child will be like. Her utmost desire is that the child be well cared for, and sometimes her perception of what is best for the baby changes. It’s a good thing that God does not waiver in his consideration of what and whom he allows in our lives. Some of you will shudder at this statement because you have suffered injustice at the hands of an abuser or a deceiver. And yet, God does not waste anything. Ecclesiastes 7:14 says, “When times are good, be happy; but when times are bad, consider: God has made the one as well as the other.� Does God allow suffering in our lives for nothing? Or does he use it to someone else’s advantage? If we will be open to healing, God will use these injustices to bless many others over the course of our lives. Jesus said, “Unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.� (John 12:24). He himself was willing to die in order to alter the lives of those who would come after him. Are we better than Christ that we will not die also, and be raised up to share the love of God?
Susan and Mike
Mike is searching for his lost son. Though Zach doesn’t know that Mike is his dad, Mike searches anyway. In the parable of the lost sheep, Jesus explains that a good shepherd will leave 99 sheep in an open field to go find just one that is lost (Luke 15:4-7). Susan sends Zach to Utah and speaks with double meaning when she says, “…you should go to him [Paul]. He’ll want to take care of you.� Her heart is thinking of Julie’s safety. Both of these parents have one goal in mind – protection. They want to protect their children in whatever way they can, and God has the same heart for us. “As the mountains surround Jerusalem, so the Lord surrounds his people…� (Psalm 125:2). Does that jive with the idea above that he allows trouble in our lives? Absolutely. Protection does not mean isolation from all things human. Humanity is sinful, and unless we depart this world, we will suffer at the hands of those who do not care for us. Still, there is protection in that God only allows into our lives what will benefit us and others somewhere down the road. He does not waste anything.
Bree
Bree stands as an advocate when no one else will stand for the kids in her life. When George tries to punish Andrew for his lewd talk without explaining what happened, her first reaction is to demand a reason. There must be just cause and not an empty accusation. Revelation 12:9-10 describes Satan as one who accuses men before God day and night. Later, when Gabrielle refers to Zach as a freak, Bree is the only one who stands up for him. She argues that Zach is the child of Mary Alice who grew up in their backyards. Like Bree, Christ stands as our ultimate advocate, discerning truth from empty accusation. “For there is one God and one mediator (advocate) between God and men, the man Christ Jesus� (1 Tim. 2:5). Christ’s work on the cross crushes the accusations of the enemy. No argument will stand against a person who has placed his or her trust in Christ. Not only is Christ the lawyer, he’s the judge.
These characters barely scratch the surface of the many ways that God models great parenting skills. There is so much more to learn, and he will teach us if we will seek the scriptures. He will also give us the strength to carry out the things we know to do. And for all you parents out there, remember that God will fill in the gaps. Wherever we fail, he will step up and parent our children for us. We can only do our best in the places we are in our lives. No amount of tweaking and refining will make us perfect parents, or our children perfect children. Just remember that his strength is made perfect in our weakness and his grace is sufficient for us.
And, if you haven't checked it out yet, please read the Message to Mom's of Toddlers (if you have toddlers, of course!).
2 Comments:
This is my summary of last week's episode. I really like this site. I'm a Christian, but I have been struggling lately. I'm a big fan of this show and I love how you are using it to teach. I'll be back to visit soon!
Each character had some interesting moments in this episode. Susan who is really becoming my least favorite character, decided to "help" Mike "find" Zach, but really she just wanted to look like she was helping so that Mike would love her. I can't believe that after she found Zach, she didn't tell Mike and then after she talked to Zach she convinced him to go try to find Paul who Zach thinks is his dad. She is getting in too deep and she's going to end up with everyone angry at her. Poor Lynette got replaced at home by an imaginary friend named Mrs. Mulberry who is a British nanny. She was so upset by it all that she threw Mrs. Mulberry's umbrella away, but it fell off the garbage truck leaving it in the road where Parker got to witness first-hand his imaginary nanny getting run over by a car. What kind of person just runs over an umbrella with out even slowly down or swirving? Wouldn't you at least try to avoid it? Anyway, that was the end of Mrs. Mulberry and Lynette felt really bad about "killing" her. Gabrielle was rockin' this episode. She tried very hard to get a conjugal visit with Carlos, but her lawyer called her a b***h and made a rude comment about her affair with the gardener. All the prisoners heard this and started poking him with sticks through the fence. It was mildly funny, but the lawyer quit. She found a new one who is a royal jerk, but she got her conjugal visit and she and Carlos were so cute. I hope they work everything out even though I will miss the gardener. I can't wait for all the baby story to start developing. But by far the best housewife of all is the incredible Bree! Her son is a loser 100%. I really hope he leaves to go to college or jail and never comes back. And I don't care if George did kill Rex, I still love Roger Bart and he is so adorably dorky. In this episode, Andrew and George almost got into a fist fight on Bree's front lawn. She invited George to dinner so that the kids could get to know him. Andrew was acting like he was having a great time with George, but the second Bree and Danielle left the room to prepare dessert, he started asking George if he had ever been with a woman, telling him how great Bree and Rex's sex life had been, and actually imitated his mother having an orgasm! What an creep! George, of course freaked out and Bree told him that they couldn't see each other anymore. She had decided that Andrew was getting out of hand again and that she needed to spend more time with him. She said the whole orgasm thing was minor, but that if he continued to get worse, she would have to send him away to camp again. George smartly used this information to kiss Bree in such a time and place where Andrew would go crazy and start beating him up. George may have gotten a bloody nose, but he also succeeded in getting rid of yet another person standing in the way of his relationship with Bree. Rex is dead, Andrew is at boot camp, watch out Danielle or it'll be the convent for you!
Thanks for commenting! I've been in and out of town for a couple of weeks now. Just recovering. Good thoughts...what is your favorite episode thus far this season? I think this season is measuring up quite well as compared to last season. I love the writers. I'd be honored to meet them!
Oh...and feel free to write me anytime to discuss stuff other than the show. We have all struggled with our faith or lives at one time or another, and just because we get over one hurdle doesn't mean anotehr one won't come. It's the nature of life...and, of course, our limited minds as compared to God's infinite one! :) Send me a note anytime to hjmledman@yahoo.com.
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